The D-Word

Oh, the D-word… Can you guess which one I mean?

I recently came across this post online: How I Saved My Marriage. It made me smile. Much like the writer, I do think there are some cases where divorce is the right choice, but a lot of bickering isn’t one of them.

Over the holidays (specifically around Thanksgiving), a few things came to a head with my husband and I. It wasn’t pretty. There was a lot of talk of how little we have in common and how we don’t appreciate each other enough – both of which are true and we’re working on. The worst of it came when he asked me if I thought I would be better off without him. Ouch.

It made me so sad to think that he could even consider that I felt that way! I mean, I’m no dummy. I know that in more ways than one, I hit the husband jackpot. I mean, look at this guy…

But I always think back to a fight we had back when we were engaged. I couldn’t tell you now what the fight was about, but I do remember how it ended. In the middle of yelling and crying and whatnot, I looked at my then-fiance and asked him if he was sure he wanted to deal with this for the rest of his life…and with no hesitation, he said “yes.”

Back to that article, though. It’s just this really great reminder that in marriage (and any relationship, really), your primary concern shouldn’t be how happy you are, but rather how happy the other person is. The whole you-can’t-change-anyone-but-yourself thing? It’s true!

So, if you have a spouse/boyfriend/best friend, think about it. “How can I make your day better?” Oh, and forget the D-word.